When the COO Says One Thing and the CEO Another
Every senior leader in a matrixed organization knows the feeling: You’re accountable for outcomes, but the signals from other executives are conflicting.
The CEO wants speed.
The COO wants stability.
Your team wants clarity.
And you’re in the crossfire, trying to reconcile it all, and expected to continue delivering results while navigating unspoken office politics.
The higher the stakes, the murkier things can get.
And the risk isn’t just results that miss the mark — it’s your credibility on the line.
Because your people will look to you for clarity when power signals are mixed.
The trap of “picking sides”
One of the biggest missteps that I see leaders make in this situation is assuming that finding alignment means choosing a champion.
But that move only narrows your influence.
Aligning upward isn’t about pledging loyalty to one leader over another — it’s about reaffirming your loyalty to the business and to your values.
I coached a senior executive recently — we’ll call her Linda — who was navigating exactly this dynamic. As Head of Sales of a high-growth ad tech company, Linda had already proven she was a top performer.
When she joined, she reported directly to the COO, who had been with the company since its early days.
But the company was now expanding globally — and the founder-CEO was pushing for speed and innovation.
That’s where things got complicated.
The CEO wanted Linda to absorb new teams and redefine go-to-market strategy.
But the COO resisted — clinging to old playbooks that once worked but weren’t suited for what was next.
Suddenly, she found herself trapped between two very different leadership styles.
And her team — sensing the tension — became anxious about who was really setting the agenda.
For Linda, even small tasks became political landmines.
What staying grounded looks like
When we first spoke, Linda told me: “I feel like I’m stuck in the middle. It’s exhausting.”
She wanted to prove herself — and fast — but her instincts told her to slow down, and carefully choose what problems to fix first.
She realized this wasn’t just about “managing up.”
It was about managing sideways, upward, and inward all at once.
Together, we worked on three moves:
Stakeholder mapping. We assessed: Who really influenced outcomes? Who was signaling one thing but saying another? Who stood to gain — or lose — depending on how the transition played out? Clarity here helped cut through the fog.
Values alignment. Instead of framing choices as “CEO vs. COO,” Linda began framing them as: Which path best serves our customers? Which path accelerates growth? Anchoring her decisions in the company’s values — and her own — gave her neutral ground.
Building stamina. These transitions aren’t sprints. They take emotional endurance. Linda had to learn to pace herself — finding ways to name her own stress and manage it, so it didn’t silently shape her team’s morale.
A breakthrough moment came when she brought her team together and acknowledged what they already sensed: “Yes, things are shifting. It’s not all decided yet. But here’s what I do know — and here’s how we’ll keep moving forward.”
For the first time, a skeptical team member spoke up: “Thank you. That’s what we were missing.”
By naming the uncertainty without catastrophizing it, Linda modeled steadiness. Her credibility didn’t erode — it grew.
The emotional cost leaders don’t talk about
What leaders rarely say out loud is how heavy this feels.
Executives in Linda’s position often absorb stress from every direction — shielding their teams while privately running on fumes.
Linda told me, “If I stop holding it together, I don’t know who will.”
That mindset is common, but it’s also unsustainable.
Leading a team through messy office politics requires so much more than strategy.
It requires self-awareness and care — finding ways to reset, so you can keep showing up clear-headed and present.
If you’re navigating mixed signals from competing leaders, remember:
Map the system before you act.
Align upward by anchoring to values, not personalities.
Secure small wins that demonstrate progress without escalating conflict.
And pace yourself. These moments are marathons, not sprints.
Because your credibility isn’t built by avoiding tension — it’s built by how you help your team navigate through it.
If this resonates, I’ve written more about navigating inherited challenges and leadership politics in Fast Company.
And if you’re facing your own version of “caught in the middle,” let’s talk. I support executives through complex power dynamics and leadership transitions.
Because you can’t control every dynamic. But you can make sure you anchor to what’s important — your values and influence.